Domestic Violence

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One woman in four experiences domestic violence at some time in her life.  Victim Support Lambeth offers its full range of services to sufferers of domestic violence, whether or not they have reported incidents to the police, and whether or not they feel ready to change the situation.  The information below may be useful.

What is Domestic Violence?
If you are experiencing domestic violence
If a friend is experiencing domestic violence
Counselling and support
Contacting the police
Legal protection
Housing and finance
Children
Helpful contacts

 
What is Domestic Violence?
 
Stockholm Syndrome
"Its a bit like torture.  When somebody has treated you very badly and then comforts you, you feel so alone and so grateful to receive that comfort and you are so glad you are not being abused, that you accept it.  I suppose like all prisoners who have been tortured, you start to feel a certain amount of sympathy for your torturer.  Also, during the good times I lost my ability to remember the abuse.  It was as if I had fantasised it, as if I had made it up." 

Domestic violence is controlling behaviour, often involving physical, sexual and emotional abuse.  It can also include threats, destructive criticism, pressure tactics, breaking trust, isolation and harassment. 

  • This kind of abuse occurs within all forms of intimate relationship, and hurts men, women and children.

  • Anyone can suffer from domestic violence, regardless of their age, social class, ethnic appearance, sexual preference, disability or lifestyle.   It ruins thousands of lives every year.

  • Domestic violence can begin at any time - in new relationships or after many years spent together.

  • It often begins in minor ways, but becomes worse over time, so that the shift from a happy relationship to an abusive one is not always noticeable.

  • Because victims are often practically and emotionally dependent on their abusers, they can find it very difficult to change or escape from the situation, and the violence can continue for years.

  • It is hard to come to terms with the knowledge or realisation that a loved one is behaving aggressively and many people find it easier to blame themselves for what is happening than to hold their abuser responsible.

  • Fear of losing the relationship is often greater than fear of the abuse, particularly where other family members could be affected.  

Domestic violence is not a private event, but a serious issue for the whole of society.  It has traumatic and personal consequences upon the family, and the greater part of society.  We believe that every family has the right to live free from violence and from the fear of violence.